“It’s the relationship that heals.”

I came across this quote (by Dr. Irvin Yalom) in graduate school, and for me it sums up pretty darn well what therapy is all about when you walk into my office (or, hop on line virtually).

My immediate goal is to meet you where you are in your journey. What’s brought you into counseling? What’s not working for you anymore, or what do you wish were different in your life? As we begin having these conversations, my goal is to be with you as you tell your story.

“Be with me? What on earth does that mean?” you might be asking. It means be human with you. Be real.

In my view, the best therapeutic outcomes and the most satisfied clients come from the therapeutic connection that develops throughout the process. My job is to create a comfortable and safe space for you to talk about what’s been going on, past and present, what’s keeping you stuck, keeping you from the life you truly want to be living.

As we embark on that journey together, you’ll experience me being real. I am down to earth, easy going, and quite human with all the usual human struggles. While I do strive to bring in my clinical expertise and knowledge (after all, that is something one ought to expect in their therapist as well), I do so with grace, compassion, humor, and tough love when necessary (which is more like me calling you out gently).

You Make Sense.

For the most part, my message to clients is always, “You make sense.” Whatever our stories have been in life, whatever our struggles, whatever the issues are, and whatever the behaviors that may be self-defeating or self-destructive, we all come to be who we are in any given moment based on a multitude of events and circumstances.

People don’t usually seek therapy because their lives are going wonderfully well. People seek out therapy when they are in pain. When we as human beings are in pain, we often aren’t at our best. Again, my message is always one of hope and compassion and validation. You make sense. And… you are enough!

The goal of our therapeutic journey is restoration.

There is an old children’s book (or song or camp chant) called, “We’re Going on a Bear Hunt.” The words/lyrics speak of running into long wavy grass, deep cold rivers, thick oozy mud, a big dark forest, and a swirling whirling snowstorm. Each time these challenges come up, the declaration is, “We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we’ve got to go through it!”

Therapy is what allows us to face our challenges, our issues, our pain, our emotions when we’ve finally come to the realization that we can’t go over it or around it or under it. We’ve got to go through it. And as you “go through it,” I’ll be right there with you.

I also like to tell clients that I have “been on both sides of the couch, so to speak.” I’ve gone through therapy in my own life on several occasions, so I understand that kind of vulnerability. When it comes to working with and understanding body image and eating disorders, in particular, I am not shy about sharing that I’ve gone through that personally as well. Been there. Done that. Over it. (Yes, I am of the belief that people can heal from an eating disorder, recover fully.)